Feast of the Conversion of Saint Paul, the apostle

I asked, ‘What shall I do, sir?’
The Lord answered me, ‘Get up and go into Damascus,
and there you will be told about everything
appointed for you to do.’ 
Since I could see nothing because of the brightness of that light,
I was led by hand by my companions and entered Damascus.

In our time, when certainty has replaced faith in the hearts of so many Christians, it is refreshing to hear of Saint Paul’s uncertainty: “What shall I do, sir?”

This Pharisee had known exactly what to do. He had to arrest Christians and make life miserable for every follower of The Way. He knew they were offending God by their peculiar teachings, even without knowing what they were teaching.

Saint Paul didn’t even know how to address the Lord who had spoken to him on the way to Damascus. He called him, “Sir!”

Nor did the Lord give him a new certainty. Rather, he said, “Go into Damascus, and there you will be told about everything appointed for you to do.”

And that information would be a long time coming. Scholars differ on how long his initiation lasted, but we know the Christians of Damascus were leery of their newest enthusiast. Eventually Saint Barnabas had to take charge of him, introduce him to the elders and apostles, and instruct him in the new Way. That may have taken several years, including a retreat into the desert of Arabia. When they set out on an apostolic mission, Barnabas was still in charge of his disciple Paul; and only later did Paul begin to lead the mission.

It is enlightening, instructive and amusing to hear the dazzled Pharisee – who had been breathing murderous threats against the disciples of the Lord -- was led by the hand into Damascus.

As he grew in faith Saint Paul would always be led by the hand of the Lord.

Moralists tell us the first response of the Christian should be, “What am I, as a believer in Jesus Christ, to do?” We have studied the Ten Commandments and read the Eight Beatitudes but we still do not know the difference between right and wrong. We know that wrong is often disguised under the pieties of grace, and right often appears altogether wrong. We know that rescuers often become victims, victims become tormentors and tormentors become victims; and the cycles of violence continue unabated. How do we stop this merry-go-round?

We ask, “What shall I do, Sir?”

On this Feast of the Conversion of Saint Paul, as we cross the threshold of hope into an unprecedented period of history we must ask, Precious Lord, take my hand, lead me on, let me stand….