Wednesday, July 13, 2011

Wednesday of the Fifteenth Week in Ordinary Time


Brother Bob
at the Chapter of Mats

When the LORD saw him coming over to look at it more closely,
God called out to him from the bush, “Moses! Moses!”
He answered, “Here I am.”

I have often reflected on Moses' immediate response to God, “Here I am.” This word, hineni in Hebrew, is the word of Abraham, Samuel, Isaiah, Jesus, Mary and countless others when they heard God’s call. It is the response to God’s name, “I am!”
Hearing God’s call, the faithful person declares, “Here I am!” It means, “I am ready, open, aware, alert, available, eager and earnest. It is an unconditional response, meaning “Whatever you ask, I will heed and do.”
But it also acknowledges the limits of our human nature. “Here I am in this body at this place and in this time.” Whereas God is present to all time and in every place, I am only here. I can neither change the past not foresee the future.
I am only this body with its infirmities and frailty. I was born on a certain day and will die on another day. I am a creature of my own time. 
People are often eager to judge those who lived in another time. They wonder how could slave owners be so blind as to think they owned other human beings. They wonder how Christian Europe could undertake the Crusades, a campaign of centuries, against Islam. They wonder why Catholic Spain cruelly invaded the areas of Texas and Mexico and savagely imposed on them its version of Catholicism.
Brother Ed Handy
at the Chapter of Mats
Aware of these and other historic tragedies, I suppose people will judge me and wonder how I could be so blind as to drive a fossil fueled car, or fail to protest unjust wars, or "go shopping," or eat meat daily. My only response, if I am permitted to give one, will be, “I am a man of my own time.”

Here I am also acknowledges I cannot control the future, not even of my own behavior. Will I be as ready to worship God tomorrow as I am today? Will I be willing next week to make the sacrifices I make today? Will I never relapse into the sins of my past? Without those assurances, should I even make the effort today? isn’t it better not to start what I might not finish?
And yet God is calling me in this moment and I must speak, “Here I am.” Hineni accepts the contingency of human life. I was not always here and I will not always be here. I am an expression of life and love on this earth at this moment. Many have come before me and will come after me. But I am ready to be here now.

Fr James McCurry
at the Chapter of Mats
Finally, Here I am is said in response to God's I AM. It is not said in a vacuum to no one; it is said in relationship, which is how we know ourselves. I cannot exist if there is no God to call me out of non-existence.Here I am is my birth-shout as I leap out of the abyss into God’s presence. If I do not say it, I must fall back into emptiness. It is my Amen to life and I am grateful to have this moment, this place and this body in which to be here for You.

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I love to write. This blog helps me to meditate on the Word of God, and I hope to make some contribution to our contemplations of God's Mighty Works.

Ordinarily, I write these reflections two or three weeks in advance of their publication. I do not intend to comment on current events.

I understand many people prefer gender-neutral references to "God." I don't disagree with them but find that language impersonal, unappealing and tasteless. When I refer to "God" I think of the One whom Jesus called "Abba" and "Father", and I would not attempt to improve on Jesus' language.

You're welcome to add a thought or raise a question.